HEATER!!

Going to a gift exchange and actually getting a gift you want!! We had a Christmas dinner tonight with all of our friends and somewhat significant others and everyone had to bring a gift under $20 but couldn't be a gift card. SO other then the two GIFT CARDS...lol... there were some nice wines gifted, a scotch decanter with glasses...BUT the gift of the night was the classic worst gift that you could possibly ask for....a game of SHOTS AND LADDERS! (sorry Pat). However, it does get worse....my friend Marcus decided to buy a mini-keg, which was selected by a young lady friend of ours who then EXCHANGED it with Marcus!!! HEATER!!

COOLER!!

Bird Sh*t!! Regardless of whether its on your car window or on the back of your shoulder (always the shoulder) birds just seem to have a radar to hit EVERYTHING that has to do with a human. I once made the mistake of parking under a bush at my sons Timbits soccer game because there wasn't much parking available and low and behold when I got back to my car it went from red to egg shell and by egg shell I mean BIRD SHIT WHITE! COOLER!!  

HEATER!!

Creating your own alcholic beverage and sharing it with your friends!!  This past summer we came up with the "HQ SLAMMER" which was Gin, Pink Lemonade and Strawberry Fruitopia.....with ice and fresh fruit on top.....fantastic! Next came the "RUGGED TUMBLER" which is Vodka, Cream Soda and Orange Juice WITH Pulp. Delish! Sometimes they are created from pure genius and other times due to the fact that there's nothing else in the fridge to mix with, but regardless of how you come up with it, it's your creation, your drink, your masterpiece!! HEATER!!

COOLER!!

Being HUNGOVER!! I won't lie, sometimes I don't mind the feeling of being hungover....but there's always that point in the night where you know you're at your breaking point and that's when you've given up the right to complain about the morning after!! You slowly roll over and realize it's morning and it came WAY to soon. No chance of you going back to sleep due to your exploding headache and turning stomach, so why not stare at the wall for an hour, doze off for 5 minutes and then wake up and run to the porcelin princess. :) Cold shower, a couple tylenol and back to bed. Ahhhh the good life!! I'm sure there will be much of this over the next couple weeks due to Christmas party's and CHRISTMAS period. So enjoy it while it lasts, and celebrate when it's gone....GOODBYE DRINKS.....HELLO HANGOVER!! COOLER!!

HEATER!!

Family members and/or pets that make you smile in the middle of the night!! This may not apply to everyone, but there's a certain feeling of happiness that's incomparable. I woke up in the middle of the night this past weekend to find my fiance passed out cold and our little "dog" Milly (yorkie) passed out in between the two of us. It made me smile. It also works for children sleeping, or your gf lying there with her mouth wide open and arms flailed accross the bed. Pretty much seeing someone you love at so much peace is a HEATER. Plain and simple.
(maybe I just prefer them when their not awake, haven't decided yet. lol.)

COOLER!!

Permacoldinthewinter-itis!  This is the syndrome caused by the inability to get warm in the winter regardless of how many layers of clothing, blankets, snuggies, furry animals and heating pads you have surrounding your person. Can I get a fire burning one tiiiime deeeeeealllller!!!???

HEATER!!

Getting a hair cut and it looks BETTER then you were expecting!! You always have that glimmer of doubt that something tragic might happen while you're sitting in that chair, but once the final hair is clipped, washed and styled....you look in the mirror and that is the turning point of you day! You either are extremely satisfied and walk out with your head held high, or you walk out coolered and looking like a blind man with a butcher knife cut it. Here's to all the barbers and hairdressers out there who make HEATERS of our days!!

COOLER!!

People who impersonate another race or culture all together to try and fit in!!
I was watching a Jersey Shore re-run the other day and have to say it grew on me this season, but the idea of other people outside of the show trying to act like "guido's and guidettes" is HILARIOUS. There was actually a group on Facebook a while back that talked about Ed Hardy and all the people wearing them were white people trying to act like guido's.....they were pretty much the funniest pictures I had ever seen!! Here's an example of one....COOLER!!

Looks like a little bit too much T and not enough G in their GTL!!

HEATER!!

Actually remembering your dream and it being a good one!! We have all woke up and tried to piece together what just happened in that mystical world of dreamland....but when you wake up and vividly remember flying through your old high school in your bathing suit eating a Big Mac with Barack Obama, you can sit back, smile and know that you are one of the few lucky ones who gets to relive the beautiful world of dreams! HEATER!

COOLER!!

Trying to explain the internet to a 4 yr old!! I was driving my son to hockey this weekend fairly early in the A.M. and he asked how I was able to send pictures to my family in Montreal.  I tried to explain to him that I am able to write something on the computer (as I'm doing right now) and people all over the world are able to read it. Now to us, we are used to it, but to a 4 year old, who thinks it's cool that milk comes from a cow and that we can control Yoshi as the touch of our fingertips on the racetrack....trying to explain how wirelessly FROM MY PHONE I can send a msg to China.......NOT gonna happen. GG lesson learned!



HEATER!!

Trying a new food and ACTUALLY liking it!!  I tend to have the type of personality that easily gets attached to things that are amazing! So when I try a new food and it`s actually delicious I will contineu to eat the hell out of it until I can no longer stomach it. Pho was my first, then it was sushi and now I`ve been put onto one of the best breakfast ideas on the go ever! Check this out.....Tim Hortons.....Everything bagel double toasted......Herb and Garlic cream cheese WITH sliced tomato AND pepper! TRY IT. You will not be disappointed. HEATER!!

COOLER!!

I RECEIVED THE FOLLOWING COOLER FROM KRYSTAL FREDERICK FROM OTTAWA, CANADA

Christmas shopping at the MALL! Come November, you tell yourself you're gonna start your Christmas shopping early this year to avoid the rush. Let's face it, more time = more money saved up and unless you wipe ur a$$ with $100 bills, you have more important things to put your cash towards this time of year (winter tires, coats, boots, fixing the furnace etc.)
So December 23rd you head out to the malls only to start cursing the minute you turn into the parking lot. The mall is packed and you had to literally fight and old man for a spot within 10 miles from the entrance. The mall is hot and the music is loud in the damn stores you need to go into. The lineups at the cash make you cringe and most of all, you secretly want to punch slow walking people in the back of the head. KEEP MOVING! COOOOOLLLLEEEERRR!!


 

HEATER!!

Watching kids play sports!! You can't help but laugh when you see a bunch of 4-5 yr olds running or skating in a flock like geese. All they want to do is get one single touch on the ball or puck. They don't care about scoring or even know what it really means, they just know that they have to touch the ball!!! All at once ideally!!

COOLER!!

The city deciding to do work right outside your house on your day off at 7:00 am!! I guess the trees on my street needed to be trimmed before the winter so why not do it at 7:00am. I also think it's funny how city workers are up at the break of dawn and government workers are the biggest slackers on earth! Shout outs to all my government working friends who check this site often because they have nothing better to do!! :)

 

HEATER!!

Chocolate Advent calenders! Seeing as how it is the first of December I figured it was only fitting to give a shout out to one of my favourite memories as a child. The Advent calender! We had a felt one growing up on our back door in the kitchen and every morning you would choose a felt christmas ornament from a set number and add it on to a velcro tree......pretty much the greatest thing as a child.  Then there's the chocolate breed that you can buy where the chocolates taste like rubber, but the idea of having chocolate regardless of taste at 7:30am before school for a whole month is such a HEATER!!

COOLER!!

I RECEIVED THIS COOLER FROM My Fellow BARTOX member DW yesterday!

“Getting a bill for winter tires and it being $600 at a discount and with the installation being done by your brother for free. On top of that still owing 80$ for another car part already purchased, which I still hasn't been paid for (So I have to pay $680 tonight totally unexpected) AND just started hearing last night that my front right break is F'd up and I will need new break pads. After I changed them only 25,000km ago on all 4 tires……. GG Winter”

Such a COOLER!!

HEATER!!

Someone you loves Birthday!! It's my daughters 10th Birthday today and it would only be right to talk about how great it is to see a big smile, get a big hug and most importantly see someone you love happy on their Birthday. I love you sweetie and have a great day!!

(FYI - SHE DOESN'T READ THIS BLOG.....MORE OF A HYPOTHETICAL BIRTHDAY WISH! lol)

COOLER!!

When someone sends a partner in crime to take up another lane at the grocery store!! We’re all in the same boat……analyze the line-ups and the people in them, pick a lane, dedicate yourself to it, and stick to it. What gives you the right to send your misfit children to aisles 3 and 5 while you’re in 8? Ridiculous. The ONLY time this is allowed is at the movie theatre. It’s a race to the face at that point. It’s an even playing field. Everyone is a mixed bag and could order simply a small popcorn or could order five combo 6’s. Send all your friends to different lanes at the theatre and all fold into one once you arrive at the pimple faced teenager working. Enjoy!

ADD YOUR NICKNAME HERE!

HEATER!!

Nicknames! Other then the obvious faux pas of creating your own nickname, any nickname you get from your friends is a great one! I have been called many things in my life some good some bad, but I have comprised some nicknames throughout the years that I’ve heard for both myself and others that are quite funny. Feel free to add your own by clicking on the link up top! My personal favourite is “Triple S” which stands for “Super Sperm Steve”. Judging by the fact that I have multiple children at a young age I feel it’s fitting. My friend Marcus is called “Ironman” due to the fact that he sleeps endlessly and clearly has an iron deficiency but says he doesn’t mind since he enjoys his daily coma’s. And the best I’ve seen to DATE that will never be beaten is my friend Steve’s buddy who goes by and I’ve heard him been called “Spaghetti man hold the sauce man wilderness man brad the gay brad the fuck up brotha brad DARB.” HEATER!

(this IS actually Brad......fits the nickname perfectly!)

COOLER!!

Having a name that people can spell incorrectly your whole life!! Whether it’s Erika/Erica, Iva/Eva or Kris/Chris having to spell your name out every single time you meet someone or register anywhere for your whole life is one of the biggest COOLERS you’ll experience. My last name is Stevenson with a V, YET almost every time I register somewhere they seem to feel the need to assume its spelt with a PH instead. So to save them the trouble, I don’t even say my last name anymore, I just start spelling it out. A little word game for them. Let them put the pieces together and finally say….”OH…….STEVENSON…..got it”.